While there are many alcohol rehab centers that cater to numerous population groups such as men, women, teens and even luxury alcohol rehab, there are situations when 2 people in a relationship have a serious drinking problem. In this case, it may be a good idea for them to consider alcohol rehab for couples. You love spending time with your partner. You enjoy each other’s company and miss each other when you are apart. You work at the same place, have the same friends, and are always having people over. You find your lifestyle fun … until you don’t. You start to sleep through your alarms for work, and you notice that your partner’s grades are slipping. You were convinced that you could live together and work toward your degree without your responsibilities faltering, but everything is starting to fall apart. There has to be a way to stay together. In your sober state, you realize that there is always beer in the fridge and your liquor cabinet has a great variety. Looking at it just makes you want to make a coffee with Bailey’s in it, but it is 9am, and you have to go to work. OK…just one. While your tolerance is high enough and the spiked coffee does not affect your senses, you still cannot believe you just did that. Hopefully, no one smells it on your breath. You decide that it’s time for couples alcohol rehab because your partner just had two of them before work as well.
How do we know if couples’ alcohol rehab is right for us?
If you could only see the future, you could decide which is the best path for the outcome that you desire. When one person wants to go through rehab but the other doesn’t, it is only setting one person up for failure. Either the relationship or the effort to be drug free may not be able to sustain the constant temptation that one person puts in front of the other. So, what are some of the benefits to seeking out alcohol rehab as a couple?
- There is a higher chance of both completing the treatment
- Alcoholics who prematurely leave programs generally do so because they are homesick. This is especially true if they are codependent; however, if a couple is in treatment together, they can lean on each other for emotional support. Facing withdrawal from alcohol can be especially dangerous, but they can face the discomfort in the safety of each other’s arms.
- Codependency treatment
- Learning to live without alcohol is not just going through detox and ridding oneself of the chemical substance. It also entails repairing past traumas or mental issues that may have led someone to drink in the first place. Codependency is usually associated with lack of self-esteem, lack of financial independence, lack of boundaries, and one of two having a caretaker mentality. In a codependent relationship, they enable each other’s bad habits. Correcting this in both partners leads to a higher chance of remaining sober.
- Less risk of relapse
- Relapsing is a natural part of trying to live with the substance that someone depended on for so long. It should not be looked at as failure, since about 40 to 60 percent of people in treatment will relapse. Couples, however, have a better chance at staying sober when they hold each other accountable.
- Couples therapy
- Couples who are both alcoholics tend to stay together out of habit, since alcohol destroyed the healthy parts of the relationship a long time ago. Even if only one partner is in treatment, couples therapy gives them both a chance to talk about issues that tore them apart — including finances, domestic violence, child rearing, lack of taking responsibility, and anything else that put a rift in their relationship.
- Post recovery support
- One of the most important parts of recovery is in the support that the alcoholic receives after they have successfully completed their chosen rehab program. If they do not have an adequate support system and feel looked down upon or judged, they will have a more difficult time staying sober. Couples who have committed to not drinking can support each other when they come face to face with their triggers.
When is it NOT beneficial to be in a couples’ rehab for alcohol?
While it seems like there is nothing negative to attending an alcohol rehab program that has been designed to help couples achieve and maintain their sobriety together, a few instances exist where it would be more beneficial to go through separate programs.
- One person has more extensive psychological needs than the other. If one has been assessed and needs dual diagnosis treatment, it is best to be done in a more intense treatment setting.
- One person is less motivated than the other. When one is constantly finding excuses to leave rehab, it may break down the walls of commitment in the other.
- When domestic violence is present, each one needs different types of counseling.
What can I expect from a couples alcohol rehab program?
While every program is different, most facilities offer the same basic stages of the recovery process:
- Detox – generally done apart so that they can be monitoring appropriately. One may need medications to help keep seizures, DTs (delirium tremens), and heart attacks at bay, while the other has less severe withdrawal symptoms.
- Rehab – a structured schedule of group and individual therapies that help someone release negativity and build positivity in their life.
- Aftercare and maintenance – while relapse is part of rehab, trying to prevent it from continuing to occur is relying on a support system that will not judge and will just help you through intense cravings that might plague you. 12-step support groups are a key part of maintenance, such as AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) and knowing where a close meeting at all times can help when someone is in crisis. If they don’t have a support system in place, it may be better for them to transition slowly back into society by staying at a halfway house or sober living home.
What types of therapies are used in an alcohol rehab program for couples?
Research has shown that the best course of treatment for alcoholism lies in a combination of therapies that provide the couple the means for lasting changes. When they learn new behaviors together, they can acquire healthy and positive new ways of communicating and interacting with one another. They will bring these changes into their new world and can learn to be happy and remain that way. What are some of the therapeutic options?
- BCT (behavioral couples therapy)
- One of the main parts of these sessions is to create a “recovery contract” between the partners. Each day they state their intention not to drink and the partner’s task is to provide support.
- ABCT (alcohol behavioral couple therapy)
- This is a form of BCT with a focus on promoting abstinence from drinking by using a variety of counseling models. Its goal is to increase communication, self-control, problem solving, and contingency management skills so that they can overcome issues that arise in the future.
- MAT (medication-assisted treatment)
- Medications can be especially important in detox and recovery from alcohol, since the seizures, heart attack, and other withdrawal symptoms can be severe enough to be fatal. These are not panaceas and are only beneficial when used in conjunction with counseling. Specific medications have been designed with the sole intention of making recovery possible. The ones used for alcohol rehab include:
- Acamprosate – Helps keep people from drinking by helping the brain return to normal functioning after the elimination of alcohol’s effects on it.
- Disulfiram – if someone drinks while taking this, they will have unpleasant reactions, like vomiting.
- Vivitrol (naltrexone) – blocks the sedative and pleasurable feeling of alcohol. Caution must be used because they body will still feel the affects of the alcohol, like impaired coordination, judgments, and blackouts. The goal is to motivate the patient to stay sober.
- AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) and RCA (recovering couples anonymous)
- These 12-step programs are based on goals that have been clinically proven to work for decades. Meeting with people who are in the same situation can help those who are recovering learn how others have handled transitioning back into the world, stressing the importance of remaining sober together.
How do we pay for a couples’ alcohol rehab program?
The number of households where both partners work increases every year. It would be hard enough to figure out how to pay for one person seeking out treatment for alcohol abuse, but couples face the unique challenge of paying for both people. Alcohol rehab facilities are aware of this being an importance to couples. There is never a reason to lose hope with the existence of programs that range from government-funded to luxury alcohol treatment centers. Examples include:
- Health insurance is the most common way to pay for rehab
- Medicare
- Medicaid
- Private insurance
- Military and VA insurance
- Affordable monthly payments
- Crowdfunding, like GoFundMe
- SAMHSA scholarships and grants
- Government funded facilities
- Non-profit treatment centers
You decide that it is time for you to focus on work and school and stop the drinking; however, your partner does not think that it is even close to a good idea. You are good through the week, but the cravings on the weekends are more difficult. That is when you get to relax, and you deserve that, right? When there is one person in a relationship that wants to quit but the other one does not, it eventually creates a rift between them. It makes it exponentially more difficult for the one trying to quit to do so and they usually end up going back to their partying ways. They express concern to a friend who says that she’s heard of couples’ alcohol rehab programs that can get you both back on the right track.
How Do I Find Couples Alcohol Rehab Near Me?